Hitting a Wall During Sex: Why Penetration Feels Blocked & What to Do
Authored by Bodyful PT and Wellness
Do you feel like you keep hitting a wall during penetration?
Do you experience burning or stabbing pain with sex?
In this blog, you’ll learn why the pelvic floor can tighten or brace during penetrative sex—and how pelvic floor physical therapy, including trauma informed and virtual pelvic floor therapy, can help reduce pain and restore options for intimacy.
What Does “Hitting a Wall During Sex” Mean?
“Hitting a wall” during sex can mean different things to different people. Many individuals struggle to describe the experience clearly.
Often, this phrase reflects a sensation of:
A feeling of tightness in the pelvis and hips
Pain during sex
“Feels like he’s hitting something”
Burning, aching, itching pain
Stabbing in vulva
Anxiety and fear
This experience can occur with vaginal or anal penetration, and penetration does not need to involve a penis. It may also happen with a finger, tampon, sex toy, or during a pelvic exam with a speculum.
These barriers to penetration are commonly driven by pelvic floor muscles and the nervous system—and they are treatable with pelvic floor physical therapy.
Common Causes of Hitting a Wall During Sex
There are many conditions and contributing factors that can create the sensation of hitting a wall or experiencing pain with sex.
Dyspareunia
Dyspareunia refers to pain with intercourse. Pain may be superficial, deep, or both. It can depend on your position during sex. Tense pelvic floor muscles are often a primary contributor and respond well to pelvic floor PT.
Vaginismus (Primary & Secondary)
Vaginismus refers to involuntary bracing of the pelvic floor muscles with attempted penetration. The person may squeeze their buttocks and close their thighs in anticipation of vaginal penetration.
Primary vaginismus is present from the beginning—you may never have been able to use tampons, tolerate penetration, or complete a speculum exam.
Secondary vaginismus develops after a period where penetration was previously possible. This can occur after childbirth, trauma, surgery, infection, or other experiences perceived as threatening by the body.
The nervous system plays a central role in vaginismus—whether primary or secondary. Fear, anxiety, and adaptive protection patterns must be addressed as part of effective vaginismus treatment.
Trauma, Scar Tissue, and the Pelvic Floor
Birthing trauma, perineal tearing, abdominal or pelvic surgery, and scar tissue can all contribute to pelvic floor muscles tension in protection.
Hormonal changes postpartum, with oral contraceptive use, or during perimenopause can also affect tissue blood flow, elasticity and sensitivity.
A pelvic floor physical therapist can thoroughly take your medical history and refer you to specialists to ensure vulvar tissue health.
Unfortunately, it is not uncommon to feel dismissed or unheard when discussing signs of vaginismus with your medical provider.
Gender-Affirming Surgery & Arousal Differences
Gender-affirming surgeries can affect the pelvic floor and may benefit from specialized pelvic PT.
People who identify as asexual may also experience barriers to penetration when arousal or safety cues are not fully present in the nervous system. This does not mean penetration is impossible—it simply means the body may be communicating boundaries.
Understanding this allows for change without force.
Why Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy & Somatic Movement Matter
Pelvic floor physical therapy helps address hitting a wall during sex by working with both muscles and the nervous system.
The pelvic floor muscles form a sling at the base of the pelvis and influence bowel, bladder, and sexual function. When these muscles are tight, sensitized, or guarding, penetration may feel painful or blocked.
With consent, a pelvic floor specialist may assess these muscles internally with embodied touch—not a speculum and not stirrups—to gently evaluate muscle tone, tenderness, coordination with breathing, and sensitivity.
That said, internal assessment is never required to make progress.
Trauma-Informed & Somatic Pelvic Therapy Options
At Bodyful, being somatic and trauma informed means:
Going slow
Offering choice
Honoring your nervous system
We work with the pelvic floor in many ways beyond intra-vaginal modalities, including:
Breathing practices
Postural and somatic movement training
External myofascial and visceral fascial modalities
Strength and coordination training to improve hip and pelvic supports
Dilators—Used Bodyfully
Dilators can be helpful, but they are not a standalone solution—especially when fear or dissociation is involved.
In trauma informed pelvic therapy, dilators are introduced with intention, pacing, and nervous system awareness so penetration is not something to “push through.”
Why the Pelvic Floor Tightens
Pelvic floor muscles tighten for many reasons:
Nervous system protection
Fear or anxiety
Trauma history
Strength and coordination deficits
Abdominal gripping during “belly breathing” practices
When the hips are tights and the glutes are weak—common in people who sit for work—the pelvic floor often compensates by tensing during functional movements.
A skilled pelvic floor physical therapist can help you retrain these patterns so the pelvic floor no longer has to overwork.
7 Practical Steps to Reducing the Feeling of Hitting a Wall
Not Just “Kegels”
Kegels often increase tension. Breathing and pelvic floor lengthening and coordination exercises are often more helpful.Hip Mobility
Some pelvic and deep hip muscles also participate in hip rotation. Healthy hip motion supports pelvic floor support.Nervous System Support
Five minutes a day of specific breathing practices or rest can reduce muscular guarding.Manual Therapy
Gentle manual therapy for the abdomen, pelvic floor muscles, and hips —can reduce pain with sex.Scar Tissue Massage
Pelvic or abdominal scars can contribute to penetration pain. Pelvic PT can guide safe self-massage in-person and virtually.Vaginal Tissue Health
Vulvar moisturizers or topical hormones (prescribed by an MD) may support vulvar tissue plumpness and blood flow.
Pelvic floor PT’s Approach to Vaginismus & Pain With Sex
Healing is not just about understanding—it is about experiencing safety.
We help you build new neural pathways so sex does not have to be associated with pain, fear, or avoidance.
This is vaginismus treatment rooted in somatic awareness, nervous system pacing, and collaboration.
We help you rewrite the story.
Work With a Pelvic Floor Physical Therapist in Oakland, CA
If you’re experiencing pain with sex or the feeling of hitting a wall during penetration, you are not alone—and change is possible.
You can work with a pelvic floor PT expert at Bodyful through in-person care in Oakland, CA or virtual pelvic floor therapy throughout California.
If you’re in California, book a visit to learn more about trauma informed pelvic therapy and pelvic floor physical therapy for pain with sex.
Your body is not broken.
It is protecting you—and it can learn new options.
References
Chalmers KJ. Clinical assessment and management of vaginismus. Aust J Gen Pract. 2024 Jan-Feb;53(1-2):37-41. doi: 10.31128/AJGP/06-23-6870. PMID: 38316477.
Raveendran AV, Rajini P. Vaginismus: Diagnostic Challenges and Proposed Diagnostic Criteria. Balkan Med J. 2024 Jan 3;41(1):80-82. doi: 10.4274/balkanmedj.galenos.2023.2022-9-62. PMID: 38173226; PMCID: PMC10767778.
