How To Relax Tight Pelvic Floor Muscles

Authored by Bodyful Physical Therapy and Wellness

Pelvic Floor Tension, Pelvic Muscle Tension, and the Myth of “Too Tight” vs “Too Weak”

As more education is shared about pelvic health, it is a revolutionary time for people to reconnect with a part of their body that has been stigmatized and shamed for so long.

The first wave of pelvic health education was simply awareness—many people genuinely did not know what pelvic health was or what it meant. That still exists today. At the same time, more people now have at least a baseline understanding of pelvic health and pelvic floor function.

The next wave often linked pelvic health almost exclusively to “kegels.” We intentionally place this word in quotations because coded language can reinforce stigma and oversimplification. Pelvic floor health is far more nuanced than one repeated pelvic floor muscle gripping.

One reason pelvic floor exercises are frequently misunderstood is that pelvic floor muscle contractions/gripping are often over-prescribed as the solution for nearly every pelvic floor concern. Fitness instructors, healthcare providers, and even well-meaning professionals may cue contraction without considering whether pelvic floor tension or pelvic muscle habitual gripping is already present.

There are times when starting with progressive loading and strengthening is appropriate. When that is the case, a comprehensive assessment is still essential, because many people are unknowingly performing these contractions in ways that increase pelvic tension or hip tightness and pain.

What we are encouraged by is a shift in pelvic physical therapy toward recognizing the importance of pelvic floor relaxation and coordination. This shift has added much-needed nuance—but the conversation can go even further.

Pelvic Floor Tension Is Partly a Nervous System Experience

The idea that muscles are simply “too weak” or “too tight” deserves re-examination. Modern, evidence-based science consistently shows that muscle tone, strength, and tension are organized by the nervous system.

This means the state of any muscle—including the pelvic floor, hip flexors, or deep core—can change rapidly depending on sensation, perception, and response. Clinically, muscle activation can change dramatically within seconds when appropriate touch cueing and verbal or visual feedback are introduced. Novel neural input to the nervous system created immediate change.

This does not dismiss the value of strength training. Mindful, progressive movement is deeply supportive. What it does challenge is the belief that your body is permanently “too tight” or “too weak.” Pelvic tension, chronic tight hip flexors, and hip pain are rarely static conditions.

Coordination Over “Gripping” or “Collapse”

One helpful reframe is to view muscles through the lens of coordination, rather than robotically gripping muscles, stretching them, or confusing relaxation for collapse.

Any strengthening practice MUST incorporate diaphragmatic breathing.
Relaxation with awareness can be the basis for toning your muscles. Relaxation does NOT mean collapse.

Breathing, coordinating it with your strengthening practice, and relaxing fully after engaging your muscles, can be integrated into your repetitive functional movement patterns and daily activities with you pelvic floor PT.

Pelvic Floor Health Is Dynamic, Not Static

Muscles are meant to be supple. They are dynamic tissues that thrive when they can embody both full range of motion and full relaxation. These qualities harmonize one another and are the basis for generating power and sustaining endurance.

One of the pelvic floor’s primary roles is shock absorption. It does this through abdominal pressure management, which is inseparable from breathing.

Your intra-abdominal system functions like a container. The respiratory diaphragm, abdominal cylinder, pelvic floor, and bones create the boundaries, while breath generates pressure within. This is why pelvic floor gripping, chronic tight hip flexors, and hip tightness and pain often coexist—they share a pressure system.

When breath and pelvic floor coordination are thriving, the pelvic floor yields, tenses appropriately, and releases dynamically, much like a trampoline. The yielding absorbs force and strengthens in response, and the release supports the full range of motion. Support is present on both the inhale and the exhale—without unnecessary gripping or forced release.

Reframing Pelvic Tension for Sustainable Change

Neither constant contraction/gripping nor constant relaxation/collapse creates optimal support. It is the relationship between full range of motion. yielding to the pressure of breath, and holding the structure of your cylinder to support your spine, that allows for healthy load transfer, efficient movement, and reduced pain.

Reframing pelvic floor tension as a coordination challenge—rather than a flaw—opens the door to more achievable, functional outcomes. We are not aiming for static muscle states. We are cultivating responsive, adaptable systems.

Approach your body with curiosity instead of urgency. See what emerges when you allow movement, breath, and awareness to inform one another.

Interested in working with us and our approach to somatic pelvic therapy, hip tightness, and unpacking habitual muscle holding patterns?
Book with us today—we would love to explore this with you.